Just business as usual in the FBI’s Unusual and Dangerous Development Division. Saving the world from good intentions.
According to some historians, Dr. Richard Gatling reportedly believed his newly-invented machine gun would make war so ghastly that people would stop fighting forever. I’ve read that anecdote in many places, but I’ve always suspected the story was a bit apocryphal. Either that or Doc G never knew an actual guy in his whole life. “It fires 200 rounds per minute and will chop soldiers in half.” “COOL!”
And he certainly never met Special Agent Hauschild.
True tidbit – I’d started scripting this episode and wanted to flesh out the meeting with a female agent, about whom I had not, as yet, given much thought. Final Draft software has a name-picking widget that saves writers having to thumb through phone books (if anyone still does that) or glance out the window and swipe the name of a florist, the way Ian Fleming did when he came up with the name “James Bond.”
So I launched the widget and hit some keys at random and it presented me with “Hauschild.” Fair enough, I wrote it in. Sounded like “House-baby” to me; I was sort of picturing a timid little woman with agoraphobia. Fine. I could do that. But on a whim, I googled it. What I got was: German: nickname for a ferocious soldier: literally, ‘
Yeah. I can work with that.
And we’ve launched a Patreon! All the cool webcomics are doing it. We’re keeping ours real simple; mainly hoping to be able to get rid of the ads. If we can drop the ads, we can get rid of the sidebars, which will allow us to make the comics bigger and prettier. So if you’re up for being a supporter, let’s make it happen!
New Vote Incentive! And full-rez 2880 x 1800 versions will be going out to Patrons at the Digital Onslaught level and above, with our thanks!
More below – including more video!
Bobservations
Getting Rough
One of the advantages of working with Max-The-Artist is that he has this amazing ability to interpret vague verbal dithering and turn it into images before one’s eyes. (This is how he also works with his commercial clients all over the world.) For those interested in the process, we have a Screen Recording video of our gChat session for this page, in which you can see how Max-The-Artist turns Bob’s rambling incoherence into a rough page sketch in 20 minutes. There is also some discussion of the characters and ideas origins, along with deep philosophical concepts such as “Hooterage.”
gChats are how we do almost every page, and we’ll be making these videos available to patrons at the Digital Onslaught level and above – but this first one is for everyone to see!
— Bob out
Max-the-Artist sez:
BIGGER IS BETTER
I’m really excited about our Patreon! If we get enough patrons, we can drop all the annoying sidebar ads and use that space to present higher resolution artwork! How frickin’ SWEET would it be see 3MM in higher res artwork?! Dad and I have, from the start, put a lot of care in the fidelity and quality of this comic- but so far, we’ve been constrained by the sidebar ads. I think this our opportunity to present our readers with a greater, purer 3MM experience. I hope you agree- become a patron today!
She has a nice smile. 😀
So does the Joker………………
It’s how you know someone enjoys their job
That’s what I first thought too!
In some versions of the Batman story, in particular from what I recall the Batman movie with Jack Nicholson as Joker, “Jack Napier” was the original real name of The Joker before he became The Joker.
That plastic-eating bug reminds me of the superconductor-eating bug that brought down Halrloprillalar’s civilization in Niven’s Ringworld series.
And now that I think about it, the UD
3reminds me of one of the functions of the ARM, a few centuries earlier…Yes! In fact, if you watch the video (now posted) you will see that I reference the great Larry Niven, along with a sci-fi book from my childhood called “Mutant 59 – The Plastic Eaters” which (as I just discovered after making the video) was written by a Doctor Who writer from that era.
I can see why the UD3 moved on this one. That could have been nasty for more reasons then the electrical grid, although that would be bad enough.
BBC back in the 70’s – Doomwatch – The Plastic Eaters
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0564476/
Thank you for that! The writers also made it into a book, which I’d read in my youth.
“Saving the world from good intentions” is probably the best slogan I’ve ever heard.
The Road to Hell and all that…
Reminds me that back in 1996, one of the dimensions in Crossworlds Film where a bacteria was created to clear up oil spills in the ocean and went on the destroy all petro chemical based products including the entire worlds oil supply.
But in this case it looks likes its the typical American gung-ho ” we don’t agree with you so instead of discussing the pros and cons like civilised people, we are going to bag you, tag you, water board you, feed lies to the press and world and feed your fingers into the mincer so you wont touch anything ever again”. All the while most likely stealing his life’s work and very likely turning into a weapon to use against who ever in the future they think needs to toe the line. Seriously they could explained the bad side to the Dr and came up with something that would either prevent it or make it have a very short life cycle so would never effect the wires.
Wishful thinking! The likelihood of that having already escaped the
Lab is very high as it is. And water boarding wouldn’t be used on a
Legal arrest of a citizen in the US. You are confusing the FBI with the
CIA Operations Directorate outside the US and Enemy Combatants
Who operate outside the protections of the International Laws of War
To which the U S is signatory. Greenpeace was coopted decades ago
By the KGB, but that does not expose them to the same ROE.
If the gentleman in question was such an enemy combatant ,
Then what you are suggesting is too much work. Once interigation
Verified no more contagion samples, then a swift execution is final.
Less traumatic for the Agents too.
This isn’t anything close to a legal arrest and these guys clearly don’t operate by the normal FBI playbook.
The difference between America and the rest of the world on this is that we feel really bad about it, generally punish those caught doing it, and publicly flog ourselves for it, meaning that it’s VERY PUBLIC. We look bad because we actually dislike things like this and publicly discuss ways to avoid it if possible.
Seriously, the whole “discussing the pros and cons like civilised people”… which government has done this, um, EVER?
CaptEndo – I personally find it hilarious when so many people complain about us “violating the Geneva convention” any time we do something they don’t like… the Geneva conventionS (there are several) rather explicitly list who they cover and who they don’t, and it’s quite clear that the vast majority of the ones who complain about that have no idea what they actually say.
Agreed! I specified the ones the US is actually signatory to. There have been a couple of more recent ones negotiated primarily for the benefit of leftist revolutionaries that do extend those protections to irregular non uniformed combatants. The United States specifically declined to sign those even though it occasionally could expose our own operatives to the same rusks( summary execution , etc) in order to have a free hand to legally deal with terrorists and insurgents.
I’m immediately thinking of Havelock Vetinari (from the Discworld books), and what he would have done with the biochemist: put the guy in a nice facility where he can do useful work under proper supervision, after having it explained to him “nice concept, but you need to come up with something that won’t destroy the planet if it gets out of hand.”
…Of course, I do not think these guys are anywhere near as intelligent as Vetinari.
No one was ever as clever as Vetinari. Always found the right people for the job, be it going to the moon or sorting out the post office or making change at the bank.
Well, at least Mr. Cicerone explained his… concerns… quite vividly to Dr. Madison. That, and he still found a use case for the existing concept. That’s something, I’d say.
…Of course, I do not think these guys are anywhere near as intelligent as Mr. Cicerone.
They may even be exceptionally stupid if it turns out that they killed the biochemist, the one who would be the most likely to stop/kill the mutating yeast. Because no one knows it better than he does.
Some might kill him just because he knows what he knows.
You won’t find a bigger Pratchett fan than myself. And the UD3 will definitely have some Vetinari overtones, though not as Machiavellian and of course more bureaucratic. They’re more about putting out fires (or, in Hauschild’s case, starting them) than manipulation.
Is that vest design for real? Or is it just something Bob & Max made up?
Are you referring to Agent Glass’ outfit? I just made it up.
Oh, you meant Agent Hauschild’s battle suit- Again, I just made it up.
Definitely not real, but appreciated in all it’s comicy exaggerated female form glory.
Yeah, no surprise there. German for children is Kinder, as in kindergarten. Hauschild would be Hew Shield, I think.
Panel 1 made me think of Dr. Ananda Chakrabarty(for a real world example. The Wiki link is here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ananda_Mohan_Chakrabarty ). Funnily enough, I had first heard of him in the Dean Koontz book PHANTOMS. Although fiction, it featured Chakrabarty and an advanced version of his invention. It also was a HELL of a lot better than the terrible movie that made of it)
Also, where has ANY government agency benefited from hiring a murderous psychopath?
Parings off on this team versus Max’s team Go!
First up Max Vs. Agent Hauschild
And I’m sure the UDDD has good intentions in doing so.
Funny thing, scientist recently found out that you can feed poly based plastics to mealworms. You have to make it small for them and long term effects have to be checked, but otherwise it works:
https://news.stanford.edu/pr/2015/pr-worms-digest-plastics-092915.html
And this today. http://news.discovery.com/earth/oceans/plastic-munching-bacteria-could-save-the-planet-160310.htm?utm_source=newsletter&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=dnewsnewsletter
Yet another page we squeaked in just ahead of reality. 🙂
If memory serves, there was an issue with something eating plastics in “The Andromeda Strain”.
Now Agent HakkaaPäälle there… I don’t like her. She looks like she enjoys her job a little too much. Plus in that last window she looks like a Vampire contemplating her next meal.
She has red irises, but not reddish (rather than merely white) skin. If she’s an albino (not a good idea for her to use incendiaries if she is), she’s using a whole lotta base makeup or has a lot of subdermal fat.
If she’s not an albino – Dude – red irises – she’s evil!! She’ll possess you. Run, run, run … err … ride for wrath, ride for ruin, ride for the red blood of Dawn!!
Seriously though, having people who enjoy violence and lack a strict ethical code is very bad for morale and unit effectiveness. That’s why even evil professional militaries weed out sadists if they want to be effective.
Also, the Andromeda Strain reference was spot on, and the others were informative.
Thank you for the update message!!
(I’m easy to get worried. Now it’s all good :D)
Thank you for the update message (UPDATE 2016-02-08)!!
(I’m easy to get worried. Now it’s all good :D)
(Also thanks for using the Japanese date format, it’s much easier to comprehend for me, probably for many non-Americans. And it sorts by date when in a filename :D)
Yes, I started using that format for my own files some years ago, just because of the auto-sort aspect.
*sigh*…. Sorry. Connection issues & impatience… I’m off now to hang my head in shame.
Oh the disappointment. I’ve caught up to real time.
Great comic. Thanks Bob and Max
Ian